Tonight was an absolute delight! Christine was a gracious hostess. Her home was filled with love and joy. She attended to every detail. The decor was a wash of black, hot pink and silver. We drank Sextant red wine in gold rimed chalices and toasted to the Peony Moon.
We learned our full moon names. I am Peony, Christine is Iris, Shannon is Rose and Betty is Lilac. It was all so fun to embrace our names. We lit our place setting candles and we prepared to enjoy a delightful dinner together.
Dinner was a variety of healthy Chinese food choices from a Restaurant in Los Altos called Peony (only Christine could find such a place). The food was amazing. My favorites where... lemon chicken, broccoli with mushrooms, salad with candied walnuts and noodle soup. Eating healthy makes me really happy and satisfied.
We drank Peony tea from crystal goblets and ate raspberry chocolates. We laughed and shared our stories. We caught up with each other. Dinner was followed by reading our fortune cookies.
We then gathered in the living room for a chance listen to a recorded radio interview with Christine's Dad...Tajalli. It was a powerful moment. His voice filled the room and our hearts. The air got cold but there was a warmth there. He was with us. Reminding us to "Smile" in the face of any circumstance...have faith that all will be well. His music played in the background as we prepared to write in our cards. We pulled silver stones and bloom cards. We spilled open about our NOW moment...the present moment...what we were getting in this moment.
I wrote and wrote not knowing if what I was writing was right or if it was what anyone expected of me. When the time came we spoke of Love, Forgiveness, Faith, Gratitude and Acknowledgment.
I needed tonight. I needed the time to be with my women friends and write about now. Where I am now. Not the wishful...want to place. But the raw, real, messy, unedited, unenlighted, imperfect, beautifully human place.
I wrote and wrote and what I came to understand is that I have needs. That may seem obvious to some...but I have been walking around in the world like what I need is unimportant but other peoples needs are important. I also have been walking in the world like it doesn't matter if people understand my needs and what I'm feeling. In the past it has left me feeling frustrated and alone in the world. But tonight. I got the acknowledgment I needed. I got to stand and be responsible for making sure that the people in my life know I have needs. I wrote and wrote and could clearly see that I have been denying that my needs are valid and important. What I can see now is that my needs can be met. People do care about my needs. I can see that when my needs are met there is a whole bunch of things I can do easily and effortlessly. I celebrate that realization.
There was a safety and a vulnerability here...and new possibilities are here...NOW.
